Talismans, Totems and Guides

Sometimes during tough times in our lives, someone or something gets us through a particular phase. When I was in the throes of my breakdown I was given a little talisman, it was a stone that looked like the face of a bear. I carried it in a little beaded purse that I wore around my neck. Sometimes I would take it out and hold it, stroking the smooth glassy surface, and it comforted me. Around the same time I was given a rose quartz stone known for heart chakra healing powers which I would hold in my heart hand. I am not sure if it was psychological but I was sure I felt the healing power of love rushing up my arm and into my heart.

Crazy things comfort me; a hare runs across the road, I Google "what does it mean when a hare crosses your path?" when I get home (it is to do with the goddess). At this stage I know what most messages totem animal spirit guides are put in our path to deliver! I enjoy the irrational and mysterious language of the soul. It is an upside down world. The supernatural is interwoven into our rational literal world but you have to look for the signs. Often it is subtle albeit synchronistic. The soul is not neccessarily something we can understand with our minds, it appeals more to our open hearts. It is hard to define or pinpoint and it has it's own logic which often defies the logic of our minds. It can be like a waking dream. Perhaps this is why I can actually commune with madmen and speaking of madmen...

In my early forties I went through another psychologically tumultuous time (c'mon, when isn't it rocky for me?!) During this time I listened to Mark Lanegan on a loop. It sounds crazy but his voice (that voice!) and his lyrics got me through some tough times. I would play his CDs in my car and just slip into an alternative universe where my soul brother got me through. Sometimes I think we have soul families. I think Mark Lanegan is a soul brother. Lanegan is famously emotionally guarded and yet his songs are achingly emotional. I can relate. Music is the medium he can express himself through. Real life, on the other hand, is a challenge. His songs about the darker side of the street, the wrong side of the tracks, survival and redemption are poignant, dark, beautiful and uplifting. He is like an old buzzard in the desert. No wonder they call him Dark Mark!

Lanegan is a heavyweight; an ex-heavy rocker with a heavy lifestyle. His battles with drug addiction are well known and he only cleaned up in his fifties. He knows the demon so well, intimately in fact, which is why I can relate to his songs. Here is someone who has been there and has lived to tell the tale (or should I say sing the tale!) In a world of charlatans and pretenders Lanegan is the real thing. He is complicated, contradictory and contrary; the moody rocker who is very polite, the heavy rocker who likes disco beats, the intimidating presence who is very humble, the outsider who loves working with everyone, the extroverted introvert, the rebel and the accommodating guy, the man who has been to hell and back and done a few rounds with his demons, also the man who advised his friend to get a fence put up near the river so his kid would be safe or as Josh Homme said “the meanest nice guy I have ever met!” All of this I can relate to very well. So I wasn’t surprised to discover that Mark Lanegan is a fire sign and 29/11 life path which I am too. No wonder I could relate to him so well even though he is a gravelly, whiskey-soaked baritone. 

You can imagine how disappointed I was when he came to Dublin and though I had a ticket to his show I could not go due to poor health and zero energy levels. Luckily Lanegan comes to Ireland a lot on tour (he has Irish roots after all) so I shall catch him next time he comes to town. We all need inspiration and someone who speaks to our soul. I have saved the unused ticket as a testament to survival. After years of wanting to duet with Lanegan the irony is that I unexpectedly met another gravelly voiced rocker but that is another story… ;-)

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/music/rockandpopfeatures/9114066/Mark-Lanegan-rock-survivor-despite-his-best-efforts.html

Death's Head Tattoo (from the album Gargoyle)

Wild thing
See the monkey in the jungle swing
Canary in the cavern sing
That the devil lives in anything
C'mon people
You know that I ain't got the wherewithal
When California starts to crawl
Makes a poor man leave his home
And if I cry for you, baby
Your death's head tattoo made me
Pray for the last one standing
Holding a loaded gun
I can see her there
Under the golden sun

Wild thing
See the man up on the gallows swing
See the creature walking through the weeds
In a garden grown from evil seeds
C'mon people
You know I can't afford to reconcile
When California starts to crawl
Makes a poor child leave its home
And if I cry for you, baby
Your death's head tattoo made me
Pray for the last one standing
Holding a loaded gun
I can see her there
Under the golden sun

Better the devil you know
Than the devil you don't